Monday, January 31, 2011

Just a little something from 2008

I feel a need to write
As if I am unsettled
Yes, it is so...
I am at a crossroads
Grasping to my youth
At the same time
Awaiting my arrival into adulthood
At almost 27, this seems as if it has been postponed
Ten years ago I thought I was an adult
And have thought that this whole time
I've made adult decisions
Somehow I always manage to fall and need helped back up
I feel ashamed
Because I am not good enough to do it all on my own
And jealous of those who can 
I feel as if I am faulted, though
Because I know I am a strong, confident woman
So... my insecurities lash out... Why?
Am I really afraid of rejection?
Why?
I am so scared when I don't know the "how"
I want to let go of all of this negative
But I have to continue to make choices
I feel guilt
I want to overcome
I want to be wanted undeniably
Feel the strength and support of another's love encourage me
What is so wrong with that?
Why am I sad?

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